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Bishop Anthony B. Taylor didn't focus on what he would be giving up when he discerned a vocation to priesthood. Instead he put his energy into trying to discover what God wanted for him.
"Being happy is not a matter of whether you're married or not, because they're a lot of people who are married and not happy at all," he said.
At the same time, he realized priesthood didn't guarantee happiness either because he knew both happy and unhappy priests.
The way his family lived their Catholic faith coupled with what he observed from the world around him taught him that fulfillment does not come from being selfish.
"You'll never be happy unless you learn to live for something bigger than yourself," he said. And that means following God's will for your life.
"I figured that if I was doing what God wanted me to be doing, I'd be happy."
And this belief has never let him down.
"God has given each one of us every gift we need in order to do what he wants us to do with our lives," he said. "So if God is calling you to something, you can respond with full confidence that he's given you whatever equipment, whatever skills, whatever abilities, whatever traits of temperament you need to do that."
People seeking to find their purpose in life should "sincerely discern God's will for your life and then take whatever steps are needed, whatever risks are needed, to do his will," the 54-year-old bishop said.
So how does one discern God's will?
"The more you try to do his will, the more his will comes into clearer focus," he said.
He used the example of a baby trying to learn to walk. The first attempts lead to a lot of stumbling and falling down. A baby is "really shaky" on his feet, but the more he does it, the better he gets until he is not only walking, but running as well.
The same is true of learning to discern God's will, he said. It starts by discerning a general idea.
In 1968 Dr. Martin L. King, Jr. was assassinated just before Bishop Taylor's 14th birthday. To him King died trying to make the world a better place. So he began to discern how he could make a difference as well. Over the next few years, he thought about many professions including being a social worker, lawyer, medical doctor and priest.
A good way to discern is to do an examination of conscience each day during prayer time, he said.
It's important to ask, "What came up during the day? How did I respond? How might I have responded better? ... What were the results expected or unexpected?" the bishop suggested.
"A lot of times, insights will come in near the end of the prayer time, in fact that's when it all comes together," he said.
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This process isn't just for deciding on a vocation, it can be used for day-to-day decision-making as well.
Ask yourself, "What would Jesus do in that context? What would Jesus say?" Bishop Taylor said. "His Gospel is so countercultural, so different than the way people in our non-Christian culture spontaneously do things, where 'me' comes first."
These discernment skills helped him see beyond the challenges of growing up in the 1960s and 70s, which were not only a turbulent time in America but in the Catholic Church as well.
While in junior high and high school, St. Mary Church in Ponca City, Okla., his home parish, experienced a lot of priest changes resulting in "a lot of instability," he said.
"It was a very unsettling time, but I wasn't much touched by that," he said. He attributes that to the fact that "my faith was not so much centered on the priests in our parish, as it was on the faith itself."
In his family, "living our faith was simply part of our life," he said.
As a young boy he was even afraid of a parish priest who was particularly stern, but his parents' example showed, despite that, "we also respected him," he said.
Priests also visited his home often and rather than being turned off by some priests who were troubled, Bishop Taylor said God "used that, also, to show me that I could make a contribution."
"I admired priests," he said. "The United States bishops took a stand against the Vietnam War. I saw where the Church was speaking out very clearly for civil rights, against racism. So I could see that my faith has something to say about how we live in this world and that a priest is in a privileged position, but also a responsible position, to be able to bring the Gospel to bear on current issues."
By 11th grade, the priesthood entered his mind as a real option for his life.
"It began to don on me that a lot of the people that social workers try to help are as poor spiritually, maybe even poorer, than they are materially," he said. "And until they have their spiritual life in order, the material help you give them is not going to solve their problems."
He saw this because his family was not immune to hard times, and yet they managed to overcome problems because they were grounded spiritually.
"Some of these people that social workers try to help, their actual problems weren't any bigger than some of the ones we had to face. But we had the spiritual resources from which to address them," he said. "My mother was sick for a lot of years, but we never worried about anything. As kids we grew up in a very secure, stable home."
He realized "the Lord could do a lot more with me as a priest than as a social worker because social work is only able to address part of the problem."
Though he had a steady girlfriend in high school, he said he never dated seriously in college because thoughts of a priestly vocation kept him from wanting to commit to anyone else.
He was active in campus ministry and made friends with those who also made their faith a priority. They began attending Mass and doing a holy hour daily.
He left the University of Oklahoma at Norman after his sophomore year and entered Saint Meinrad Seminary College in Indiana as a seminarian for the Archdiocese of Oklahoma City in 1974.
"I did not think that I had all the answers already," he said, but "I was confident. The Lord had never let me down."
The coursework wasn't a problem and unlike many of his seminary classmates, he never "agonized" if priesthood was right for him. "Once I got there, it seemed like a good fit. I felt very much at home," he said.
In 1976 he graduated from Saint Meinrad and went on to the Pontifical North American College in Rome where he attended the Gregorian University. This was very different from the formation he received at Saint Meinrad.
"At the Gregorian, my fellow students were from all over the world," he said. It provided a "much broader experience of Church."
Having never regretted his decision to enter seminary, Bishop Taylor was ordained to the priesthood at St. Mary Parish in Ponca City in 1980.
Bishop Taylor said discerning God's will is important for everyone, regardless of their vocation in life. Otherwise, they fall prey to following the false gods worshipped in today's American society.
He defined these gods as possessions, power, pleasure and prestige.
"If a person doesn't examine their life, they'll just naturally be swept along in pursuit of one or more of those false gods," he said.
It is important to ask, "What am I doing in my life that is still at the service of those false gods rather than the true God?" he said. "Because those false gods are all living for oneself and not for others."
Even though Bishop Taylor grew up in a home where the Catholic faith was a priority, he said young people who don't have that advantage could still choose to follow God, even if their parents do not.
"Some of the very best Catholics are converts and that includes people who are raised in Catholic homes," he said. "God has no grandchildren, he's only got children; every generation's got to convert."
Even growing up in a troubled home can cause a person to have "a greater hunger for what you know is missing from your life. And God uses that hunger, that opening, that brokenness, that emptiness and he can fill it," Bishop Taylor said. "The disadvantage of growing up in a very solid, stable, healthy, Catholic home is complacency because if you feel really secure, the danger is you'll settle for that."
For parents who want to help their children discover God's plan for their lives, Bishop Taylor said, first it is important for them to "get their own spiritual life in order."
"Parents need to live their faith fully and sincerely and transparently because young people are very good at seeing hypocrisy," he said.
When parents live that way, "your kids will know that, even if they don't say it, and your witness to them will be a lot more eloquent and effective," he said.
And living the faith is more than just attending Mass on Sundays.
"It should be evident also that you've made decisions because of the faith and that's the way you're living your life," he said. "The faith is not just an interest you have, but rather, it's the basis from which you make decisions in your life."
Then parents must support their children through their discernment process, which means, "holding up the priesthood as a great blessing if a person is called to that."
Young people, he said, like a good challenge. Well "the priesthood is not a call to a mediocre life."
"It's a call to be the best that you can be. The best that God can make you if that is your call. It's a demanding life," he said. "It's a life that is exciting and full of meaning and joy. It's a purposeful life. You feel like you're really making a contribution and that's where happiness lies."
How will the bishop promote vocations?
Bishop Taylor said he would promote vocations by, first, praying for them everyday. He would also encourage people to consider religious life or priesthood.
"This diocese already has an excellent program, especially Msgr. (Scott) Friend," he said. "I will support him in his efforts, support the seminarians that are in formation and do what I can to minister to the priests that are already in ministry."
He said he wants the seminarians to know that he is not just interested in getting them ordained; he also strives to make sure "those who are ordained flourish in the ministry."
The bishop said he also wants seminarians to be prepared for the reality of ministry in Arkansas, which includes being bilingual. They must be able to fluently speak English and Spanish. They must also be comfortable collaborating in ministry alongside laypeople and religious women.
"I would like for them to see how much their spiritual life is enriched by being Catholic in the true sense of universal; being concerned about everybody," he said.
Featured in Arkansas Catholic's special July 19 "Vocations 2008" section.
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